


The Quiet Ending

by tigriswolf



Series: comment_fic drabbles [282]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Break Up, Character Growth, POV First, Poetry, Sadness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-29
Updated: 2015-11-01
Packaged: 2018-04-28 18:44:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5101649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigriswolf/pseuds/tigriswolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, endings aren't explosive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title: The Quiet Ending  
> Written: October 28, 2015  
> Original, PG  
> Prompt: any. any/any. I can't remember what brought us to this.

Do you remember how we met?  
I asked you for a pen,  
To fill out a job application.  
You were sitting at the counter  
Of the Starbucks I always went to  
But I’d never seen you before.  
You smiled at me, I remember that.  
You smiled and  
Held out the pen you were using for Sudoku  
And I asked, “You do that in pen?”  
You replied, “You don’t?” 

I didn’t get the job, remember?  
But I saw you again two weeks later  
Sitting at that same counter.  
I saw you again and I thought, _why not?_  
I thought, _what’s the worst that could happen?_

I didn’t think it’d be this.  
We don’t even slam doors anymore.  
We haven’t argued in three months.  
I fix our tea in the morning  
And you do the dishes  
And I keep up with the laundry  
And we share the paper without a word. 

I don’t know when I fell out of love with you. 

We were so happy  
And I don’t know when it faded.  
I don’t know where it went,  
Our sense of adventure, our delight in everything.  
_what’s the worst that could happen?_ I asked myself  
And then I asked you out for a coffee.  
And you smiled at me, looking up from your book,  
And you said, “We’re already in a coffee shop.” 

I bought you a cakepop  
And I laughed at your terrible jokes  
And I told you some of my secrets  
And you shared your own.  
Looking back, we were so young then.  
Looking back, I miss so much.  
I don’t know where it went. 

I don’t know when I fell out of love with you.  
Do you know the day you stopped loving me? 

I don’t want to say goodbye  
But I can’t keep living this half-life.  
It doesn’t even hurt anymore  
And that’s the only reason I cry.  
I gave you all of me and took all of you  
But now there aren’t even embers.  
I was so happy, once.  
I want to be happy again. 

Do you remember how we met?  
One day, I’ll look back and I’ll ask myself,  
_do you remember how you walked away?_  
I know you won’t call my name, won’t ask me to come back.  
I know we’ll never kiss again, or hold hands, or dance.  
I know you’ll never smile at me again,  
That bright grin I first saw in Starbucks.  
I know it’s over, has been for a while,  
Dying a slow death while we went through the motions. 

I’m not sure what I’ll miss more:  
Who you actually were,  
Who I thought you were,  
Who I was with you,  
Or who I thought I was when I loved you. 

I did love you.  
I know that you loved me.  
I don’t know when it stopped. 

I would’ve fought, once.  
I don’t know how we’ve reached the point  
Where I’m content to walk away.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written: October 30, 2015  
> Note: I showed my mom this poem and she wanted the other perspective.

I noticed in the spring,  
When the world began to warm—  
I didn’t smile at you much anymore.  
Our days continued on and in the heat of summer rain,  
I looked at you and noticed how you always looked away.

Could I have saved us then?  
It’s possible, I suppose.   
And I realized then I didn’t want to   
Because I didn’t love you anymore.   
When did it fade away?  
I don’t know.   
Why don’t I care anymore?   
I don’t know that either.   
But I did love you so much for so long   
And I think I’m staying now   
‘cause I don’t know who I am if you’re gone.

If I had known where lending you that pen would lead;  
If I had known it would end with both hearts breaking;  
If I had known this awful silence would result,  
Avoiding glances across the table,  
Sharing meals without a word—   
I think I would still have handed it to you,  
Still would have smiled at you,  
Still would have sat there with you  
Because what we had was so beautiful   
And all beautiful things fade. 

You flirted adorably   
And I fell completely   
And here we are.   
It’s over, I know, but I’m afraid.   
Who am I alone? 

I try to smile at you but cannot hold it.   
I try to speak to you but the words stay on my tongue.   
I miss your lips and your arms;   
I miss how we used to dance, terribly but laughing all the while.   
I miss the days when our love was young. 

I noticed in the spring   
And now the year is turning.   
I know that you’re walking away now,  
An ending a long time coming. 

I don’t know when the ending started;   
I don’t know how it’s come to this.   
So many words I never said;   
So many things I never did;  
So many hopes languishing –   
Who am I without you? 

I guess now I’ll have to learn.   
I’ll miss you –   
But is it you   
Or the you in my memory? 

I smiled at you;   
I laughed with you;  
I loved you. 

But it’s all gone now  
And while I was happy once,   
I know I’ll be happy again.


End file.
